a near-death experience..

We were dumb, plain dumb, and we actually thought we were being smart...

Some random IBMer sent us an invite for a seminar which would be 'life-altering'!! and blah blah.. of course we didnt't beleive that a bit.. nothing can change your life so drastically.. at least not a seminar.. at least not mine.. I have a problem with listening for more than 10 mins continuosly.. I never could..

But we thought it would at least have a 10% effect.. maybe! And we thought we could get up and run if it gets too boring.. so five of us, feeling quite proud of ourselves that we were leaving office 3-4 hours early, started towards the venue of the seminar.. for somehting we foolishly imagined to be fun.. All the while making jokes about 'how jobless are we' to be leaving for a seminar on a weekday!! and somehow, we were quite happy about it..

We reached the place, having narrowly missed being hit by a bus and an auto, and almost killing a biker and a pedestrian.. (the lady who had graciously given us a lift was driving in a sari.. which is the world's most uncomfortable thing!!.. though at other times I kind of admire her driving. it's kinda good).. It was later in the evening when we realized being part of an automobile accident would actually have been better..

Anyways, we were the first to enter the hall.. "Oh my God.. what if we were the only people in there?? we cant even get away!!" but slowly the hall filled up with people inching towards their slow death..

And then it started.. not at all what we had gone there for.... A splendid case of false marketing.. we were promised a life-altering blah blah and what we actually got was a sorta cazy, hyper person trying to sell us a 3-day 'self-help' course.. He kept jumping up suddenly screaming random phrases.. 'passion!! passion!!' and long clueless sentences.. sumthing like.. "your past is not in your past, but in your future.. you are not a product of your past.. but the future you are living into.. " and as he rambled on abt "past future crap crap... future future.. this view that view.. crap crap future future.." I really wanted to get up, shout to his face "dude you are screwing my 'present'" and walk away from that inferno.. but no, i sat there stupidly enduring all and that wishing that this particular guy hadn't been born..

Oh, and he was not alone.. he was aided by a team of what appeared to be actors in those cheap 'Telebrands' commercials.. all eagerly jumping up and describing how wonderful this course was.. They were all so eager to grab the mike that if sumone would have told them that only one speaker would have a chance, we could have witnessed a 'mass wrestling' match right there.. All we could think was.. 'How much have they paid you to say this?? We'll pay you double to just shut up!!'

After around 3 hours of this , I heard the sentence which was like nectar to my ears.. "Thank you all for coming".. we didnt hesitate for a miute..grabbed out stuff and ran like mad.. the gracious 'lady in the sari' had slipped out 20 mins earlier clutching her phone and yelling "hello.. hello" into it..

It took me a long walk in the fresh air with a friend, and a huge cup of coffee to become human again..

So ppl! Next time someone gives you an invite for a 'life-altering' seminar, forward it to your worst enemies.. :)

Friday the 13th!!

I guess I’ve always been slightly paranoid about train journeys (not unnecessarily, I’ve had my share of rotten experiences) and hence I never travel alone. And I realized today is Friday the 13th!! And I’m going to be on a train tonight!
Well I don’t usually believe in superstitions.. naah.. they’re just stupid.. though I might believe in jinxes and ‘touch wood’ n all.. (they’re REAL!!)..
But couldn’t help Googling abt ‘Friday the 13th. As usual found a cornucopia of stuff..

So many legends behind one superstition.. Ctrl+Ved from Wiki..

The most interesting and easily the most gruesome one was about the Knights Templar.. (sounds familiar?? Yeah yeah Da Vinci Code).
The Knights Templar were a monastic military order founded in Jerusalem in 1118 C.E., whose mission was to protect Christian pilgrims during the Crusades. Over the next two centuries, the Knights Templar became extraordinarily powerful and wealthy. Threatened by that power and eager to acquire their wealth, King Philip secretly ordered the mass arrest of all the Knights Templar in France on Friday, October 13, 1307 - Friday the 13th! And probably massacred them all..

Another interesting but kinda silly legend goes like :
The actual origin of the superstition, though, appears also to be a tale in Norse mythology. Friday is named for Frigga, the free-spirited goddess of love and fertility. When Norse and Germanic tribes converted to Christianity, Frigga was banished in shame to a mountaintop and labeled a witch. It was believed that every Friday, the spiteful goddess convened a meeting with eleven other witches, plus the devil - a gathering of thirteen - and plotted ill turns of fate for the coming week.

LOLZ.. Can’t blame her.. poor thing was named Frigga!! Frigga?? Hehe..

And there’s a truckload of folk-lore revolving around this.. Google it up.. it ranges from fascinating to mildly interesting to down-right mundane.. (there was something about a stock-market crash .. that Black Friday one that we all kno abt.. but still, after stories of Witches and Kings , this one sounded lame.. )

But this little para made me sigh in relief..

For many, the number 13 was considered a lucky number (such as 13 lunar cycles each year), but with the efforts of Christianity attempting to degrade all things Pagan, they promoted 13 as an unlucky number, with Friday thus also being considered a bad day of the week.
(Btw,Pagan is a term given to nature-worshippers.)



So, today is actually lucky for Pagans.. I’m soooo Pagan.. (at least for today) well I believe in ‘touch wood’ n all.. This started off as an old Pagan ritual – the ancients used to tap or knock at trees for invoking tree Gods and tree-dwelling nymphs and fairies to bless them with good fortune and that slowly turned into the ubiquitous ‘Touch Wood!’.

Nyways, bottom line.. though it’s Friday the 13th, I’m safe..

uh..Touch Wood!!

Dirty unwahsed Jeans..

Bangalore’s heaven these days .. Been raining the whole week.. not the mad pouring kinda yucky rain; the nice, musical drizzling rain- the kind that makes you smile as soon as you wake up, a nice lazy smile and crawl back into bed, snuggle up into the lovely warmth of your favorite blanket, and go back into the world of dreams….
The kind that makes you want to listen to MJ’s ‘heal the world’ in full volume.. makes you miss your coffee-buddy ( every one has a coffee-buddy- somebody with whom you have awsum coffee conversations, lazy banter about nothing and everything, without a care in the world.. my coffee-buddy is a certain freak called Ezzy)

I was walkin to work today, in the cold morning, where everything seemed to be bubble-wrapped in misty damp dullness, with miniscule rain drops kissing my face and MJ crooning in my ears, very happy with the world.. I was fantasizing about bunking work and playing dirty sloshy football in the rain with my friends (BUT that fantasy will never materialize coz my friends here would NEVER bunk work!! ) .. nyways I have an extraordinary imagination and somehow the smile never left my face.. and my grin got wider when a cute somebody on the road returned the smile!

I was wearing a dirty unwashed pair of jeans today ( the rains prevent you from washing clothes u kno!) and while I was walking I slipped my hand into the pocket and hey presto! The unmistakable feel of money! There’s something extremely delightful about finding money in your old jeans .. a childish joy akin to finding a sunken treasure.. lolz..
Hmmm..This mention of treasure brings back a certain old memory..

Long long ago, when I was little, I read these books where kids go n find an ancient treasure in the middle of an adventure (remember Famous five and Tom Sawyer??) and obviously I used to fantasize about it .. the adventure held my interest more than the money( I was a silly child) ..and one summer I went to my grandmother’s place..
She had this beautiful puja-room which I loved to visit. One day I found this tiny little cupboard kind of a door in one dark corner of the room. That minute was the best, most thrilling one in my life so far!! I slowly approached it , to prolong the glorious moment and opened it with trembling fingers.. Stuck my head in and peered into it.. and got the biggest fright of my life!!!!! It was full of cockroaches.. hideous ugly scary creepy crawly absolutely disgusting ..cockroaches…

Nyways where was I? yeah.. old jeans.. That gives me an idea.. go home hunt in your old cupboards for discarded old jeans, trousers, ..whatever .. and turn the pockets out.. you might find something. ..an old love note, leftover pocket money, faded photographs.. unwanted marksheets… lots of interesting ‘maybe’s.. if u do find sumthing.. plzz lemme kno.. just scribble it in a comment here…

Adios!!

A whole new Blog!!

Hi ppl..

I have started a new blog.. to post little blogs..
I call it Li'l Musings.
Random thoughts, quick scribbles..

CHECK IT OUT at..
Li'l Musings

an epiphany!

OK.. Sometimes, CRAP happens. And you know what? There’s nothing you can do about it. And you better not!

Coz the Rule of Craponomics says that..

When u try to handle the mess in your life, it just gets worse. Crap multiplies.

Sometimes you might feel very lonely. Sad ..depressed..blah blah..
So what? You won’t die… you won’t get uglier than you are.. there’ll still be things to eat in this world and idiotic things to be watched on TV.. so what’s the big deal?

Lie low, and wait for it to go.
Oh, but no… If u’re like me, u wont do that.

U’ll think u’ll feel better if you talk 2 someone, so u’ll call people up in the middle of the night.. 2am. Of course, they don’t have crap happening, so they’ll be asleep. Someone might groggily answer the phone , just barely conscious and faintly curious that u’re dying or something! U mumble an apology and hang up. Then you end up feeling doubly lonely PLUS supremely embarrassed.
The Rule in action.

Some jobless scientists came together, did a research and found out that there’s a chemical ‘anadamide’ in chocolate which makes us feel happier when we eat that. Like hell it does!! I bought a Bournville( Yeah the one with the MORONIC ad) .. no use at all! Waste of money. And thank God I don’t fret about calories or there’d been more crap!
(U know wat? A friend of mine was telling me abt this guy who was actually calculating the number of extra push-ups he’d do after every bite of Pizza!! lolzz)
Anyways, the point is, u cant eat a chocolate n drive away ur misery!!

Similarly, taking a walk wont help, music wont either, (The Rule dictates that u wont find d song u’re lookin for)….Every thing u try to do will have a nasty aspect to it which will get magnified the more u try.

So lie low, keep to urself and relax!! It’ll go when it’ll go! Save urself and others the nuisance! (read a useless quote sumwhr.. 80% of the people don’t care abt ur troubles and 20% are actually happy dat ur troubled!)

The point, ladies and gentlemen, is that Crap happens!!

Turning 22..

I counted thrice to make sure! Not that I doubt my Math skills that much..(I do, a li’l). But still, bloody 22! That’s how old I’ll be 3 weeks from now. Sucks, big time!

22! That’s old! Ancient!

My schooling years were beyond cool! Better than anybody could wish for. Still, I wouldn’t want to be stuck as a kid all my life. Love the freedom that comes with growing up. Neither do I want to go back to the stupid, messed up teen years –naah! I like my wiser, sorted self better. One of the best things about growing up is that ur thinking gets a lot less messed up.

But wait a minute, didn’t I start out by cribbing about growing up? But I can think of a 100 good things about being 22! Being able to make your own choices, getting over the silly crushes, finding all the mushy-mushy movies repulsive :D and oh yeah, Earning!
I love my bank account..the way it almost magically fills up at the end of every month, even though I heartlessly keep emptying its contents.. here ..there ..everywhere!..

So then why does 22 bug me so much??

Coz I realized time’s running out! 100s of things to do, and manybe not enough time.. All my ambitions are lying unfulfilled and I’m 22 already! I wanna accomplish those when I’m still young and not as a middle-aged aunty!!

Another freaky thing about crossing ur 20s (esp. if ur a gal) is that the whole world (except U of course) is suddenly interested in getting u married. I was a some function recently, and people were so unbelievably talking abt my marriage right in front of me! Happily oblivious to my disgusted embarrassment. “This guy’s doing this”.. “That guy’s earning that much”..” this is such a good match…”.. I almost said -“good match?? Shove it up ur…..!!” Almost.

All in all, I wont be as crazy as I usually am, for my birthday this time. I want it postponed.. at least until one of the things on my huge, (maybe over-ambitious) ‘to-do’ list gets knocked off.



PS : one of the things could be to get at least 10 comments on my blog posts.. That ‘fakeiplplayer’ guy gets 1000s on his posts! Maybe I should start insulting people on my posts like he does…. Hmmmm…. Maybe!

A day well-spent

This Sunday was different. No malls or movies, no lazing or sleeping round the clock,no shopping or washing clothes.
I spent this Sunday attending spiritual classes with Anil and Ramana at a program called “yoga retreat”..

I know, it sounds heavy, but it wasn’t any hard core spiritual session that would drive you mad or leave you snoring in ur chair or kill your desire to live .. it was a session where simple facts about life were discussed amidst a few games and funny videos and some very soothing music.

I’ve always stayed away from spiritual stuff.. I don’t even look at the spiritual kinda passages in CAT paper.. (did I tell u abt my hobby? Appearing for the CAT exam every year..lol). But I went this Sunday. Dunno why. Maybe because it was being conducted at ISKCON- one of my fav places. Or maybe I really needed to bring about some change I my life… well whatever.. I was glad I did.

Some interesting things from yoga retreat..

They were talking abt reincarnation and the concept of indestructible soul n all..
But what really caught my attention was when they spoke about ‘self-confidence’. We were shown a video-clip of the indomitable Lalu Prasad Yadav. During a parliament session, he was asked to translate his Hindi speech into English, and he didn’t hesitate even for a second. Everybody, including the speaker was almost choking with laughter, but he went on, delivering ridiculous statements with supreme confidence. And he was having a ball! I loved his ‘devil-may-care’ attitude!

We thought the songs being played were Spanish or Latin, but they turned out to be Sanskrit shlokas being sung by western singers who murdered the phrases. But then, liked the music.

The best part of the day was the session was a presentation which ended with a question to God..
“is there anything u’d want your children to know?’
And he says

I’m here for you………………………….Always!